It's been so long since I've posted anything. There were a million times that I could have written...probably should have written. I'm here now though and I don't know how I'm doing. I guess I'm the only one that would truly know how I'm doing and I'm not sure.
I continue to get food challenges from my nutritionist although not as often as I have in the past. We're starting to work on some other things but I'm still afraid of some foods. What am I afraid of?? Starbucks. I go there most days of the week to get coffee to start my day. It's not the coffee that gives me sweats. It's the mocha...the frappuccino...the pumpkin spice latte. I started to frequent Starbucks as I was losing weight so I have never had one of the infamous pumpkin spice lattes. Every fall it rolls out and every fall I struggle with the decision to indulge. I foolishly mentioned this to my nutritionist and it immediately went on my challenge list. One of my goals for recovery is to get my body to a healthy place to both c carry a baby without extra strain on my body and to be in a good relationship with food so I can be a role model. One of my biggest fears is that I will continue to struggle, my kids will see that and think that's how they should be eating. Anyway...it took several weeks, and many failed trips, before I finally got up the nerve to order one. One of my reasons to be brave is for the baby I very much want. So I ordered it. Walked to my car. Sat down and took a sip. The results??? I wasn't in love. I drank the whole thing of course. It was good but not what I was expecting. It was incredibly sweet. Too sweet for me. Will I order it again? Perhaps. Will it be a venti? No. Am I still afraid? No.
I guess that nutritionist knows a thing or two that I don't. I hate when that happens.
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